Just recently a pastor told me about 20 young adults who left a historic, inner city church because he would not promise to remove the pipe organ within a month of the commencement of his ministry there. Their justification was that they "did not like the worship." So they left. The church has a storied history with many elderly members who have been faithful for decades. The twentysomethings left the church because their preferences were not being served in corporate worship. By doing so they forfeited a great opportunity for spiritual growth. And they showed great immaturity, though they probably are oblivious to it. They probably feel as if their separating from (and thereby dividing) the church was not only justified but absolutely called for in order for them to worship the Lord more wholeheartedly. I say "probably" because, although I do not know these 20 individuals, I have met their spiritual cousins and have listened to their justifications.
Well, what should a 25 year old member of a staid, pipe organ, downtown church do when the worship music does not seem to be his natural "voice?" Here are a couple of suggestions. First, he should remember the Scripture's teachings that remain in force even in this area.
"Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another" (Romans 12:10).
"Let no one seek his own, but each one the other's well-being" (1 Corinthians 10:24).
"Love...does not seek its own" (1 Corinthians 13:5)
Corporate worship is not a duty-free zone for Christian deference. Every church member should remember this when sizing up his or her congregation's expressions of worship.
Secondly, the church member should recognize that he is part of a body that has multiple generations. As a church continues to exist and incorporates people of various generations or from different cultures into its membership, its voice will (read "should") change to reflect that growth in variety. Obviously, leadership is crucial at this point. The elders--or other church leaders--must be wise in teaching and explaining how the church should work to offer its best expressions to the Lord in worship. Members should be willing to thoughtfully share their concerns and questions about this. As a pastor, I welcome suggestions that are made in humility and out of obvious concern that our church's corporate worship be more and more God-honoring. On the other hand, I refuse to cave into the threats--implied or stated--that are sometimes made in the form of "suggestions." Those who make them, or who would divide a church over music, are at best very immature believers and need to be encouraged to take seriously their commitment to Christ and His church.
The healthier a church is, the less likely it will face severe conflicts over corporate worship. So, issues of worship should be studied and considered in the context of a rigorous ecclesiology. It is incumbent on the leaders of a church to work hard to teach the members the importance of church life and to help cultivate a true sense of community. When brothers and sisters are relating to each other as "members one of another," they will be much better equipped to work together in offering to the Lord their very best efforts in worship.